Just when I thought I'd had the best rejection evah!
Ampersand have gone and done it again.
What's gonna happen when I actually send a piece that they want? Ampersand Books
Well, this a rejection note, but you wanted a great one. Now I feel self-conscious and not sure how to go about topping the one you got last time.
Uh... honest reasons for rejection:
1) I quit smoking a month ago and really have a hard time liking anything anymore. Most of the time I'm not even sure I like my wife. Coffee is still good, though. But without cigarettes, coffee doesn't make a lot of sense.
2) I've read so many submissions I think I've forgotten how to read.
3) Just finished two books just days before the deadline, but showing up at AWP without books to sell is still a possibility. (stressful).
4) I have a 150 lb. dog I haven't been able to walk because she's been in heat. She punched me twice while reading your story. That might have something to do with it.
Pretty good, huh?