Ampersand have gone and done it again.
What's gonna happen when I actually send a piece that they want? Ampersand Books
Well, this a rejection note, but you wanted a great one. Now I feel self-conscious and not sure how to go about topping the one you got last time.
Uh... honest reasons for rejection:
1) I quit smoking a month ago and really have a hard time liking anything anymore. Most of the time I'm not even sure I like my wife. Coffee is still good, though. But without cigarettes, coffee doesn't make a lot of sense.
2) I've read so many submissions I think I've forgotten how to read.
3) Just finished two books just days before the deadline, but showing up at AWP without books to sell is still a possibility. (stressful).
4) I have a 150 lb. dog I haven't been able to walk because she's been in heat. She punched me twice while reading your story. That might have something to do with it.
Pretty good, huh?
Cook
About Ampersand Books/review/online
Ampersand Books is a madcap romp through literature’s unexplored basement, a heroic quest to its highest peaks, a gasoline-and-banana smoothie. Our books are nuns in thongs and dogs playing poker, gallows humour and deathbed confessions, honest country preachers with that con-man’s smirk. Our books are celebrations of the written word, explorations of the written world, concentrating on fiction, the short story, Bloody Fine Chapbooks, and the critically acclaimed literary magazine, The Ampersand Review, available both in print and online.
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